Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Again for the First Time

I feel like I've learned so much about God over the past year. And to me, they're huge things. But when I say them outloud, it sounds lame. Because I haven't really learned anything new about God. He hasn't changed. I've learned things that I've taught in Sunday school for years. But now, it's more than words. I've seen and experienced.

God is the Great Physician. In the States, I don't need God to be my Great Physician. If I get sick, I take some meds. If it gets worse I go to the doctor. Quick and easy. And I have the money to pay for it all. Here, we have to trust that God will heal. God can do things that no doctor can do. There was a man from Princeton, New Jersey who developed a tooth abscess on Monday. The left side of his face was so swollen it looked like he had a baseball stuck in the side of his mouth. We prayed. Not just once. Everytime we prayed (before breakfast, before construction, after construction, before lunch, just for fun...) we asked God to heal him. Wednesday rolled around and he was feeling better but still not too hot. We decided he needed to see the dentist but before he went, we prayed and put it in God's hands. He got to the dentist only to be told that the abscess had drained and was started to heal itself. There was nothing more the dentist could do.

God is the potter. I'm just a piece of clay. I can't do anything on my own. That is such a relief when I think about it. To know that God is shaping me. He knows what He's doing with my life and the end result will be beautiful. There are many stages in making a clay pot when it just looks so...not like a pot. The clay gets built up then torn down only to be built up again. But the whole time, the potter has an end goal in mind. And the clay has no say in the whole deal. What right does the clay have to say, "What do you think you're doing?" It's just some balled up mud. I trust with all I am that the Potter know what He's doing.

There's more. But I haven't processed it yet. Honestly, I'm a little scared to head back to the States. Comfortable. Selfish. Prosperous. Lazy. Lukewarm. I still am all of these things. Some more than others. And it's not that I think the United States is filled with awful people who are all going to Hell. Nothing like that at all. But I think in the States we're blinded. By politics, money, media, culture, "morality". The status quo. Within the church and without.

That was not the intention of this blog. I just wanted to tell you guys that I've fallen more in love with Jesus. And it's wonderful. I'd say you should try it. But it's nothing you can do. I had to realize I'm just a piece of clay, but I have a friend who knows what's up.


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